Back in June, someone posted a threat towards me on my Facebook wall. Not only a threat but this person added in extra terrible nasty words that made me sick such as calling me horrible names, saying hateful words, that – didn’t want to see my face anymore, and that – didn’t care if I got hurt. Note that I’ve met – in person only once and throughout this post I’ll be using a hyphen because I of course do not want to reveal this person’s name. Only a very little amount of people who are close to me know about what happened on that low point in my life. – post brought me to a dark place, to a place where my thoughts were running wild, keeping me awake at night. I’m open to share the long full story with you if you asked me to in person because I believe it can help you whether or not you’ve experienced something similar.
I dealt with a lot that week. How I handled the threat parts towards me is something I don’t want to further discuss in this post, but if you wanted to know, I’d be fine with sharing the process I had to go through with you in person. Dealing with the scary threat was more difficult than dealing with the hurtful labeling and whatnot. I don’t care who you are, things like that are disgusting and not acceptable to say to anyone in the face or typing it from behind a screen.
President of Proverbs 31 Ministries and the New York Times best-selling author of Uninvited and 19 other books, Lysa TerKeurst said in The Today Show, “Don’t bash, hash, or trash on social media because the Internet never forgets and make sure that we don’t invite public opinion into our very private pain.” Since what happened to me was through the Internet, I thought this quote was very appropriate. HURTING PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE, but you know what? HEALED PEOPLE HEAL PEOPLE.
I forgot how much time passed but, – post was removed and Facebook also removed – account. Before and after it was up, I never lashed back out to -. I would never stoop down to – level but rather lift – up. Fighting back wouldn’t solve anything. If I ever had a chance to speak to – again, I wouldn’t attack – with, “How could you say those things to me?” or something like, “You’re trash *and then continue on saying more damaging things from there*” The approach I would take would be to better understand – situation, starting out by not ignoring what – said to me, but do address it by saying, “What you said to me on Facebook back in June really did disturb me and was not okay by any means, but I’ve decided to not let what you said to me take over my life and be a rainy cloud over me because I don’t want to live the rest of my life frightened and hurt. I want to live healed and because I am, I want to bring healing to you too. I forgive you for what you posted on my wall.” Then I would go on to better understanding – situation by asking, “What did I do to you that was so wrong and made you upset?” and “How could we settle this?” and “What’s going on in your life that you would like me to know about?” and “How can I help or pray for you?”
I know that God honors how I handled everything because I am being obedient to His Word. In Romans 12:17-21, Paul said, repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. “Therefore if your enemy hungers, feed him; if he thirsts, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Note that on that night when I found out about – post, of course I went to God in prayer first, but another thing that was essential to me was talking it out with someone accountable. For me that was my parents and my roommate. Just showing them the screenshot made me uncomfortable but talking to them helped me a ton.
Friends, I don’t know the answer to why God allows what myself and others may call bad things to happen in our lives, but as hard as it is to process and see God in it, those bad things can be caused so that God’s power can be manifested to us, bring glory and honor to His name, bring us closer to him, and remind us that He is in control. His will will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Walk in the promise that you are never alone. Through the storm He is Lord and He is with you always. I hope you never have to go through what I went through. Ever.
Another verse that has helped me when things are falling apart is Proverbs 3:5-6 -> Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. I noticed how paths is plural. God won’t just direct you in one path, but in every path you will take in your life! Sometimes the Lord will cause something to happen that you won’t understand at the time but someday you will know.
X O ,
T I N A
Tina Rebecca Ko 